It seems that the new trend in the skin care world is microdermabrasian.  I was very excited when I learned about it, because the prospect of using a barage of chemicals and machines to remove my dead skin cells is exciting.  Now that I know they are there all the time I can't stand it.  Dead skin cells are everywhere, watching me, stalking me, waiting to ruin my awesome fair complexion.  Thats why I had to develop my own high power Microdermabrasian kit.  Not only will this kit save you from the evil life sucking undead skin cells it also clears out your sinuses.

 

 

At first I wanted to horde this special kit for myself, but then I couldn't bear to let the people of the world fall to the evil un-dead skin cell confederation.  If you paypal me three easy payments of $500 the kti will be yours, and you can join the war against thier evil ways.

 

I have decided that if I could pick two works to sumarize Dell computers they would be

 

 

 

 

 

Seriously I think that Dell finds dead computer components from other brands and peices them together into some lifeless monstrossity that is given life by mad Dell scientist in a secret lab.  As an owner of two Dells I am satisfied by thier performance, but recently a friend of mine from back home was telling me how his dell was the best personal computer on the market.  He payed over $2300 for his PC.  When I told him that his Dell may be nice but it was nowhere near the best pc on the market he insisted that he was right and I was mistaken.  I promptly went to apple.com where I built a computer that was roughly twice as fast, and had 6 gig more ram.  Given the computer I built was 10,500.  Dells are fine and dandy but they are no where near top of the line.  You want the best PC money can buy go bite the bullet and buy a Mac.

 

 

Needless to say when the Scion line initially came out I was not at all impressed.  I watched so many people seem awed by thier new fresh design, but I think that they look retarded.  Even if you do find their design fresh and new you can't overlook the fact that they have the same engine as a Toyota Echo which means it has no real horse power, more like donkey power, or as I like to call it ass power. It seemed like the line was completely beyond redemption until the release of the Scion tc.  Even though I had some definite prejiduces about the Scion line I wanted to withold final judgement until I had test driven the entire line.  Well that time has come, and I have to say the Scion xb was just as ugly in person as it is online, however, it's interior room is nice.  The ride in the xb was comfortable, but the severe shortage of ass power kills it for me.  I wanted to see how quick it would do 0-60, but I didn't have enough time if I wanted to drive the other vehicles.  The xa is ugly offers none of the interior room that the xb offers and still suffers from the same lack of ass power.  The only thing it has going for it is the price.  The Scion tc was the best ride (because it actually had more than 105 horsepower) it was smooth but shifted slowly almost like the sportmatic transmission in my car.  It was annoying for anyone who enjoys driving a five speed.  It boast alright room for the backseat, but it lags behind almost all the other cars in its class in space.  All in all the Scion's were alright, but certianly not worthy of all the hype surrounding them.  In the same price range you can get a much better deal like the Mazda 5, Honda Civic, or even the VW Jetta (closer to the price of the tc).  Scion has a lot of potential for the future.  I hold fast to the statement that the Xb is the ugliest car in production.

Top THREE reasons American Teachers RULE!!!

 

1.) American Teachers Smoke Weed with Students http://www.local6.com/news/4276133/detail.html

 

2.) American Teachers Have Sex with Students

 

3.) American Teachers Prepare You For the Real World http://www.9news.com/acm_news.aspx?OSGNAME=KUSA&IKOBJECTID=7a45c74e-0abe-421a-0027-93269f4508b9&TEMPLATEID=0c76dce6-ac1f-02d8-0047-c589c01ca7bf

 

Wow it seems like recently teachers have been stealing the spotlight away from the Catholic Church.  It seems that there is now a competition between teaching and preaching for which profession is the most corrupt.  Smoking is in no way new to the church scene, but its not something you see happen at school every day (at least not teacher endorsed weed smoking). Personally I think that the pot smoking teacher is awesome, but my opinion doesn't hold much wieght at the PTA meeting.  Seriously though between the teacher sex scandle and now this teachers are giving priests a run for the money.

I believe in democracy even as pure democracy scares me to death, so vote in the vote caster about which profession is the most corrupt

It was extremely exciting to hear that EKU would be in the NCAA tournament for the first time since 1979! After spending a great deal of time thinking about the tournament, and reviewing EKU strengths and weaknesses I have developed this easy list of five things that EKU needs to do in order to assure a NCAA Tournament Victory;

 

1. Practice THREES, EKU has to solidify itself from behind the three point line.  Without some better three point percentages there is no hope.

 

2. Keep up the morale, EKU can't get intimidated by the big name competition in the conference.  When it boils down to it EKU has the samec chances as everyone else.  Its all about playing the best game that you can.

 

3. Go ahead and start a steroids regiment for everyone associated with the team.  Everyone needs to be extremely huge.  We can't compete with big school talent without some big school steriods.  We even need to give the steriods to our cheerleaders, nothing like some huge harry ass women to add to the intimidation factor.  If we start the steriods now everyone can be as cut as the incredible hulk.

 

4. Its also a good idea to arrange for accidents for the majority of teams you play star players.  Random gang related shootings, hit and runs, anything to make sure they won't get to play.  If we make these teams play off thier bench we MIGHT have a chance.

 

5. I hope it doesn't come to this but my gut tells me it will, EKU is probably going to have to kill all of thier competition.  Its a harsh reallity but if we want the title and the money, prestige, and coverage of the title we have to get our hands a little dirty. 

 

 

In conclusion I think that if we follow these easy steps then we will have a really good chance of getting the title.  Even if we do lose, we will at least have the rep of being the most hard ass school in the nation.

I have to say I am guilty of jumping on the CSI bandwagon.  I enjoy the show, and thought that it was fresh and new addition to an otherwise dull lineup.  Now after the third CSI has come out I've come to the realization that all network tv shows will be either CSI (as there are still 47 states left and I inticipate an international series in the near future) or Law and Order (a series that had more incarnations than Micheal Jackson has had plastic surgeries).  Inevidably there will be a showdown of epic proportions where CSI and Law and Order will fight to the death.  I have created the following visual aid to illustrate this point;

 

The battle will definitely yield to the side that can find the most ways to drag out the same themes and present them in what appears to be a fresh new way.  Even shows that aren't CSI or Law and Order like NCIS (NCSI hmmmm?) and Cold Case are such close hacks of the two warring factions that you might as well count them into the broader category.  The true attrocity in all this is that shows that are fresh, new, and creative like Star Trek Enterprise get mustled out because there is no room for anything outside of the mainstream.  Please vote in the pole who will win CSI or Law and Order. At least we know who is losing, US, were losing countless programs that could have been a refreshing part of our otherwise boring television viewing experience.

Today in my relentless searh for the article about a man who was tased by police  for trying to pilfer from a chuckee cheese buffet (http://www.whas.com/script/headline_newsmanager_alt.php?id=389800&feed_id=64) when I came accross an article about a group of teenagers who were engaging in what they call "garage jumping" please take a moment and check out this article(http://www.local6.com/money/4239256/detail.html).  Not only has this story questioned my faith in mankind, it has also reinforced my belief in Darwin's theory of natural selection.  These people don't need monatary compensation they need to be bred out of existance.  In fact I have a comprehensive plan to help deal with the garage jumping issue which I have laid out in this easy to view image:

 

Utilizing this system the city can insure that anyone STUPID enough to engage in garage jumping doesn't get the chance to reproduce.  It may seem cruel, but we have to take drastic steps if we are going to maintain our place on the top of the food chain. If you ever had doubts about the need for frivelous law suit legislation consider this case.

Unfortunately when I came to college I was under the misguided impression that I would be the tutor of individuals who had excelled in thier perspective fields and had an in depth knowledge of thier field of study.  I was sadly mistaken.  Throughout the entireity of my ENG 212 course here at EKU I have not once heard my english teacher say something more inciteful than; thats a good observation Sally, I have never looked at it like that before, or how did this make you feel?  I don't feel like she is teaching as much as she is commenting on what we think of a litterary work.  Since it is an English class I understand that different things can be interpeted by different people, but thier have been instances in the class where I am near certian that she hasn't read the assigned work.  She has admitted on several occasions that she doesn't understand the works of key litteary figures such as Blake, Keatts, and Dickenson.  How can someone who doesn't even have a grasp on basic litteary masterpieces expect to enrich the minds of her students.  Perhaps she should start with soemthing a little easier like the complete works of Suess.  How does Eastern expect to get SACS reaccredidation with professors like this?  Have a terrible teacher leave a post.